Stupid Cupid!

I had crush on a shy guy

I’d seen him look my way

I felt the arrow of love

But how to say be mine? Kiss me! Say the word, you got me!

Light bulb, a Valentine!

I picked one out that said ‘You’re on my mind’ with pink hearts all aglow

I looked high and low, where’d he go?

Then in the bushes, his bare behind bobbin’ up and down

I tore that card up fine as snow

Stupid Cupid

 

On my own, my first job

Imagine my surprise to see

My desk was right beside a man

Who could make me do handstands

All week I felt a barb in my heart

What a way to start!

When he offered to take me to lunch my heart was smitten

He opened up some catfood and called me his kitten

I never went back to that dump

Stupid Cupid

 At my sister’s wedding

I thought the photographer was hot

He finished with the wedding party and said

he’d like a few shots of just beautiful me

I felt the arrow again, okay I replied                              

I followed dreamy to his studio

But wouldn’t you know

He wanted all my clothes off first

I have the feeling I’m utterly cursed

Stupid Cupid

 

I’ll never marry

Never in my life

Never have a husband

never be a wife

and if I ever find that cherub

I’ll jab him with a knife

Stupid Cupid

Stupid Cupid